Take what resonates. These are general.
Do what makes you happy, oh wait, you don’t know what that is and won’t till you quit your addictions. You already know that your problems are due to your habits. You aren’t stable mentally, so that means when you do them it only aggravates your mania and depression. You can fight, run, hide, but your enemy is going wherever you go because the enemy is inside of yourself. The advice is obvious, do what makes you happy till you forget about wanting it again. You need help with this. You will struggle more than you need to if you try to do it on your own. Don’t be selfish either, the reason there’s an issue is because you’ve invested into the wrong things. Have faith in your recovery process. The person who’s done the most wrong here is the one who is always creating drama instead of answering questions. You need help to quit and you will feel much better afterwards. Going to your past is a trap that you are putting yourself into. You might think people are doing things wrong but your judgement is impaired and you can’t see clearly. Fighting with people who would do anything for you is probably not the smartest idea. It’s not working for you right? Stop fucking doing it.
You’re really irritated waiting and hoping people will want to meet up with you and you aren’t seeing that some bigger force is trying to keep you out of trouble and away from people who are no good for you. Do what feels right to you and turn your focus to your relationships at home. Your friends and coworkers are not long term and you know this. The reason things feel like a cycle repeating for you is because you are not choosing to be the Best you you can be. Open up. You have the strength in this bond to be able to do so. You want to be accepted for how you are so maybe you should do the same for them in return. You’re not happy and your problems are you focusing too much on luck to solve your problems instead of just committing to practically tackle them over time. They don’t want to keep being involved in your bullshit. You create your own problems. When you can admit you have a problem, you can ask for help and get it. You think eventually it’ll make you happy to have materialistic items quicker but all it’s doing is getting you colder in the relationship. In the past you used to be an honest person but you got caught up in the wrong crowd somewhere along the way. You’re not happy because your’e scared to have something good for once. It’s something you’ve never had and now that you’ve had it you’re afraid to lose it. You think you didn’t deserve something this good, so it’s scary. You feel stuck because you are investing into things rather than the one who you always wanted. You could be really happy if you’d just slow down and be you, the real you.
You had to go because you were immature, or will be. TOO. MUCH. DRAMA. You are not stable. You are probably really disassociative right now. You don’t want to pay up but it is the right thing to do. Thievery isn’t a cool or forgivable thing. Your cycle will continue to do this till you close it out. You can be happy and it’ll stop just stop giving into the wrong things and instead give to the right ones for you. You already know what you need to do. Don’t do anything that makes you feel bad or uncomfortable. You’re the one who has to live with it.
We have free will to conform to things or not. Understand from a higher level of consciousness that you need to evaluate the situation and see what it means to you that you perceive things how you do…and why? If you feel like you’re investing too much into something that is not satisfying you why not focus on what you like to do then? You deserve to be happy and feel confident about it. You’ve been happy independently before. You’re not stable and fighting alot because you’re ignoring yourself. When you take the time to slow down, enjoy, appreciate, and be fair to yourself like you are to others, then things you thought that wouldn’t work out for you will. What you want you’ve been blocking from yourself but that’ll change. They don’t want you to leave, they just want you to look at other options to make you happy when they’re busy. Do whatever makes you feel good and confident within yourself, whatever it may be. Being unhappy isn’t really who you are, it’s just what you had to be according to the overbearing, negative, and toxic people in your past to keep you stuck. Arguing won’t grant you your wishes. You’ve invested alot under that face but it’s time to move on and get a new one. Be the rebel you are to anything that resembles the restrictions you once endured. Nothing or no one is worth losing yourself over again. If you’re feeling stuck get out of your head, stop being anxious, and realize you can have whatever you want. You can stop playing the victim role. It is also a form of control and manipulation to act that way, and you’re not like that so be careful to not do it. Whatever you’re still mourning over go within to receive the messages about how the denial of these offers to you were actually in your favor. You wouldn’t have been happy or stable in those places or as successful. You lack confidence because people who were miserable themselves wanted you to stay stuck with them and may only be coming around again to get you held back up. You aren’t allowing it to continue any farther. What you are going to do is stop feeling guilty or apologetic about being happy now. You’re not bound by this negative energy anymore and because you’re not going to deal with any funny business you can now feel at ease. You’re not going to keep fighting because you no longer feel such an urge to. When you can stop acting petty, you can have a good fortune and who you want to turn things around for you. If you expect it to be quick you’re going to get disappointed. Be happy not so much while focusing on what you can do for them it instead yourself. Offers that seem too good to be true are. Take your time being picky through the options, and then when you got it you can lay your burdens down and walk away from them. Stop pursuing things that don’t make you happy . They love you. You love them. You don’t want to split, and they’re not betraying you. But you are not stable and you really need to make yourself happy because by you not you are looking like the asshole here and that’s not the case. You’re scared to do your new thing even though it’s exactly the new challenge you need. Let go of who they made you be and edit yourself to your own preferences.