you said you hated my face
you said my food looked like shit,
but i could already tell from your personality if those things were true your mouth would’ve already quit.
days came to pass,
your moods always different.
some pleasant and sweet,
some short with sass,
never the less you were heaven – sent.
we related with alot, more than I could with most.
you wondered why I was so hard on you during work,
and afterwards more gentle and maternal, letting some things coast.
in you I saw a younger me,
back a bit ago when I started being a moody teen.
who was different and all my life verified that,
I usually felt alone, and like no one really had my back.
We shared contact info and I let you know
anytime your mom can’t be around and you don’t wanna be alone, Im a call or text away and with me is always somewhere you can call a second home.
need food? let’s eat
something dirty? come do some laundry.
want a ride home instead of a walk?
you never really accepted my offers, but you started to smile more around me, and hugs were now offered!
when you heard about my ex, you told me you’ll kill him,
when I quit my job and had to leave, there already was some grief.
I’m glad we kept in touch and grew our friendship more.
even after you found out about my past and job you still never called me a whore.
you were always there to talk with me, about the philosophical sides to this reality.
and how we are labeled as strange and abnormal, when we’re the ones aware of what’s surrounding “the Formal”
you’re not the first of one of my close friends to die, but it still hits me hard every time.
seems like some fucked up kind of joke, that the ones who can see the real me always disappear and go ghost.
but it is what it is,
I know you’re moving on and to you i toast,
Rayvon, you’re an incredible being, and your warm greeting and hug is one of the things I’m looking forward to the most.
till then I’ll send you good vibes when I see your signs, and make sure you’re there waiting for me when I catch up with you on the flipside!